The following post is by MPFJ staff writer, Melissa Batai. Melissa is a freelance writer who covers topics ranging from personal finance to business to organics to food. She blogs at Mom’s Plans where she shares her family’s journey to healthier living and paying down debt.
I was born in the early 1970s. In 1978, there was a huge blizzard that closed school for over a week. I had hand-me-down boots that I wore, and yes, I wore bread bags to keep my feet dry in my boots. So did my best friend down the street and many of my classmates. It was normal.
After the storm, when school was closed, my friend and I put a ladder up by the side of the house and climbed up. We slid down off the roof into a huge pile of snow. I can’t tell you how many hours we did that and how much fun we had.
Too much fun, I guess, because the friction from the shingles wore out the seat of my snow pants. My mom was not impressed. Buying a new pair wasn’t an option. Instead, she set to work patching them.
Most of my clothes were hand me downs from my older cousins or thrift store finds. I didn’t feel bad when I got hand me downs. I was excited to see what new-to-me clothes I would get.
My family didn’t have much money; we had to be conservative. But most of my friends were in the same position, so living this way was normal.
Things have radically changed since then.
Now, if you rip out a pair of snow pants, you’ll likely get new ones because really, how can you be expected to go around with patches on the seat of your snow pants? No one walks around with patched clothes now, not even toddlers who don’t have friends they have to worry about impressing.
Frugality Is an (Unpopular) Option Now, Not a Treasured Skill
For many generations of Americans, being frugal was a treasured skill and a richly admired trait. My grandparents, who lived through the Great Depression, continued to be frugal into their old age. My grandma was well into her 80s when she finally stopped washing tin foil and baggies to reuse.
My aunt, who learned her frugality from my grandma, made hats for her bridesmaids’ to wear. The main component of the hats? An empty, washed tuna fish can that she covered in fabric to make the center of the hat. True story. (That hats looked good, too. You’d never guess what they were made of.)
Years ago, this type of frugality was not unusual. Now, it’s scoffed at or openly ridiculed.
Each Generation Is Wealthier Than the Previous One
This topic of how much our society has changed with regards to possessions and money was brought to the forefront recently when U.S. Senator Joni Ernst from Iowa mentioned wearing bread bags inside her boots when she was little. Twitter was soon abuzz with laughter and jokes about the use of bread bags.
Megan McArdle of Bloomberg View argued in support of Ernst, saying of America’s history, “all along, Americans got richer and things got cheaper—especially when global markets opened up. Payless will sell you a pair of child’s shoes for $15, which is about two hours of work even at minimum wage. Perhaps that sounds like a lot to you—two whole hours! But I’ve been researching historical American living standards for a project I’m working on, and if you’re familiar with what Americans used to spend on things, this sounds like a very good deal.”
McArdle goes way back to the late 1800s and says, “There’s a scene in one of the [Little House on the Prairie] books where Laura is excited to get her own tin cup for Christmas, because she previously had to share with her sister. Think about that. Now, go into your kitchen and look at your dishes. Then imagine if you had three kids, four plates and three cups, because buying another cup was simply beyond your household budget—because a single cup for your kid to drink out of represented not a few hours of work, but a substantial fraction of your annual earnings, the kind of money you really had to think hard before spending. Then imagine how your five-year-old would feel if they got an orange and a Corelle place setting for Christmas” (Bloomberg View).
While my extended family may not have struggled as much as Laura Ingalls Wilder’s family, they did struggle. My mom and her brothers and sisters all went to a parochial school while growing up. My mom recounts one time she and her sister took the money from their part-time job to pay for their own schooling because my grandparents simply could not afford the tuition that year.
Yet we live in a time now, fifty years later, where parents are expected to help pay for their child’s college education. If parents decide not to or can’t afford to pay for college, they are often looked down upon, as if they’re shirking their parental duty.
At What Price Does Our New Found Wealth Come?
In many ways, Americans are very lucky. Thanks to globalization, we pay much less for the goods that we need. McArdle highlights this point saying, “Growing up in the 1950s, in a comfortably middle-class home, my mother’s wardrobe consisted of a week’s worth of school clothes, a church dress and a couple of play outfits. Her counterparts today can barely fit all their clothes in their closets, even though today’s houses are much bigger than they used to be; putting a family of five in a 900-square-foot house with a single bathroom was an aspirational goal for the generation that settled Levittown, but in an era when new homes average more than 2,500 square feet, it sounds like poverty” (Bloomberg View).
Even those among us who struggle financially likely have residences with clutter. Goods now are so easily gotten and for so little that stores like The Container Store flourish.
But the low cost of goods is not the only reason why we’re enjoying a higher standard of living. More and more, both parents work and bring in two salaries. In that way, we’re more affluent than the many generations before who typically had one parent stay home to care for the children.
Keeping Up with the Jones’ and Dealing with Peer Pressure If You Don’t
As I said, when I was young, most families had to be frugal because most mothers stayed home with their kids. Only one parent worked. This was the same in most families I knew.
Now, more than 50% of households with children and two parents find both parents working. In these families, they likely have two cars, nice (designer) clothes for both kids and parents, and money for recreational activities. They might save for their children’s college.
If a family still chooses to have one parent stay home, money will be tighter. Perhaps the family only has one car instead of two. Maybe they buy a smaller house than their peers. Maybe their grocery budget is more conservative and they choose not to buy their children expensive snacks for their lunches.
Chances are, both the parents and kids in these families will hear comments from families with more money. Adults may wonder why they only drive one car or say something like, “We could never live with only one car.” Kids might get teased for their hand-me-down clothes and homemade lunch snacks.
What used to be normal in our society is now something to be teased and mocked. Joni Ernst experienced that on a global level on social media.
How about you all? Do you agree that our culture no longer encourages frugality? If you’re frugal, how do you handle the peer pressure to buy more and make more money?
Share your experiences by commenting below!
***Photo courtesy: https://www.flickr.com/photos/teegardin/6097066382/
